5 Questions to Ask Before Filing For a Divorce
While every couple is determined to make a marriage last, things can get chaotic as the years go by. If you are in an unhealthy relationship, there is nothing left to do but file for divorce.
However, divorce decisions must be made after assessing all your options. You need to be sure that you are ready to fight for your assets and the custody of your offspring.
Here are the 5 questions to ask yourself prior to filing for a divorce.
1. Have you done everything in your power to save the marriage?
This is essentially the first thing that you need to answer before calling the divorce attorney. You need to make sure that there is absolutely no way left to make your marriage work.
If the current state of your relationship is making you unhappy, you need to consult a marriage counselor or a psychiatrist to determine whether getting a divorce is the best option. If you still think that there is room for improvement, it is advised to make a list of things you can do to make a last-ditch effort.
Before you seek the help of a professional, it is important to identify the main conflicts in your relationship. If you are struggling to communicate these issues with your partner due to emotion, you can bring a respected outsider to facilitate the communication.
By interacting with your spouse or going for private counseling, you can determine whether the marriage is salvageable or not. Once you are sure that divorce is the only solution to your marital problems, you can start seeking legal advice and begin preparing yourself for the future.
2. Are you going to be emotionally healthy after the divorce?
While you may be feeling frustrated and unhappy at the moment, you need to give a serious thought to the aftermaths of a divorce process. It is only plausible to give up on your marriage when you can confidently say that you are at peace with the idea of separation.
Leaving your spouse can be extremely traumatic and emotionally draining. Hence, it is essential to assess your emotions very carefully before opting for a split-up. If you are ready to walk out of the relationship without any feelings of anger and exasperation, then you can certify that your emotional health is exceptionally well maintained.
It is also important to ask yourself whether you are willing to stay single for an indefinite period of time. Unless you have another option in the dating world, you will certainly be facing the consequences of the failure of your marriage alone.
Any spark or ember left between you and your spouse can prove to be the reason for emotional stress in the future. Hence, it is vital to prevent yourself from making life-changing decisions during an emotional chaos. You should put away all the feelings of confusion and anger and entirely concentrate on the issue at hand.
3. Have you consulted an attorney?
One of the most important things to do before filing for divorce is to talk to a reputable attorney. As divorce is complicated, you need to educate yourself on all the fundamentals of the family law before you even consider a split-up.
These laws vary by state and are constantly being updated. Hence, it is essential to hire the services of an attorney in order to protect yourself in the best possible way. You should be capable of handling issues regarding money, assets, child support, custody problems, and other legal aspects.
During the consultation, you need to ask the attorney for the best possible strategy for your separation. In addition, you should be aware of the cost of hiring all the experts before going through the process. After you opt for consultation, you need to discuss the way assets are divided in the court of your state.
It is important to ensure that the division of property will be beneficial to you after the divorce. If you are in possession of a premarital agreement, you can provide it to the attorney. This will help you determine whether the aftermath of the divorce will be tough or stress-free.
4. Is safety guaranteed after the divorce?
The safety of you and your children is very important in the aftermath of a divorce. If you are in an abusive and violent relationship, you need to take all the necessary steps to ensure the safety of you and your children before you file for divorce. The first thing is to decide whether you want to stay in your home or move to a new one.
While moving out may seem a good idea at first, you must consult your attorney in order to ensure that the move does not damage your custody claim. If domestic violence is the issue, there are innumerable resources that can be beneficial to you. You can go for a restraining order or consult a judge.
This may even force your spouse to leave the home. On the other hand, if you intend to take your children and leave the house, you must hire a lawyer and acquire a court order for custody. It is also essential to provide your attorney with details about the severity of the domestic abuse. This will help you find the best course of action for your future.
5. Are you prepared for the future?
While it is easy to file for a divorce, the consequences that follow are severe and irreparable. If you have children, you need to remember that you will always be their parents. It is your responsibility to forget about emotions and place the best interests of your children above yours.
However difficult it may seem to communicate with your ex, the two of you will have to engineer a way to keep your children happy. Remember that you will also have to fight for custody once you decide to separate.
There are many other consequences of separation that can damage your lifestyle in the future. You will have to face all your relatives and friends who have been affected by the failure of your marriage. Loneliness and pain can be overwhelming in this situation. Hence, you need to ensure that you have the full support of family and friends before you decide to go through the process. Ending a marriage is not a decision that should be taken lightly.